Storyboard 1

Day in day out, she passed by the same walkway, heard the same din, whiffed the same smell and watched the same scene on her way to the theater. She can only find solace in the soulful songs emitted by the PA system, thanks to the zoo's deejay.

Her job is so mired in routine she was that she felt mechanical, almost robotic, as if she was part of the fittings in the zoo. Typical eight to five, with an official one hour lunch break in between. .. Nothing exciting. Just offering enough money for her to live by.

Can I not wake up the next morning? Please," she asked, with a sad wistful look on her face. Tears of sadness drained down her face.

Silence was the only word he could offer.

The lion had just refused to acknowledge her capability to conform to the required standards.
It conveniently still believes that she have yet to convince it that she worthy of it and she deserves the right to be granted a 'pass'..

She nodded in a daze, gazing into its eyes. It averted them. She stared at the back of its coat billowing in the soft zephyr as it walked swiftly back to its den. It seem to be a flagrant crucifixion of her gloom destiny, for soon it will be the day when the zoo keeper will decide, is she or is she not worthy of being in that zoo.

If she fails, she will be back in the wild, fighting with development for a place to stay, for food to eat, the right to live..

She searched vainly, futilely for the slightest sign of recognition from its impassive face. There were none. Like all of them, it had learned to mask stark knowledge well.

She stared at the computer screen blankly. She felt like screaming but no voice came out. She had this urge to smash the monitor into smithereens but instead she sat there, slumped in her chair.

There was no one around to comfort her, no one to cling to and she ended up crying into her pillow until it was all wet and soggy and her eyes all puffy and red.

**

But Faith - is all you can have here.

There are things you cannot control, cannot affect.

Don't let your fear and rage demolish the single standard left, however nebulous His intentions.

Everyone needs guidance. Like everyone else, she needed all the guidance she could get from God.

"bless me oh Lord. Guide and protect me, Lord, and to provide all the wisdom and necessities in order for me to handle and to take charge of the situation and to provide me your ability that will bless every word, every situation, every person, every thing that I face with pure joy and happiness. With every confidence I have in my body, I lift it up to you and trust upon your favors that it is peace and happiness that every one will have at the end. Amen."

Immediately after that, she felt at peace.

The ever so faithful God had revealed this to her:

What has come has gone.
Now it is time to pick up the pieces and move on.
Now, its time to tie up all the loose ends.
And leave with no regrets...

Oh-wimp-picks

MR. LEE, WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU??

How come you got demoralized so soon?

With Lin Dan's aggressive style of playing and Mr Lee's all-round defensive style, I expected this match to be one hell of a match since the gold medal is at stake. RM1,000,000 out there waiting for Mr Lee. I expected smashes that break rackets and unbelievable dives to save the shots...

However these are all expectations. Just like how I expected Josiah Ng to enter the kierin finals.

Perceived performance was below par. Mr. Lee made too many unforced errors. 21-12, 21-8 in 39 minutes :(

Well, maybe Lin Dan was just too good for Mr. Lee. Maybe Mr. Lee was too complacent- that's what my parent's says. Maybe it's just not his day today as most of his shots weren't accurate. But Lin Dan had the home crowd advantage too. Ah, whatever it is, at least he went into the finals so it's quite an achievement.... CONGRATULATIONS, anyways. Good job. At least Mr Lee helped put Malaysia on the medal tally- 1 Silver :)

CRAP, I better get back to work for I have spent far too long minding how Mr Lee played when I could have used this energy on "marketing" my recommendations. Application of Service Gaps model and ServQual model, how??

However, life has been generally dull. It's hard to gather the will to complete your assignments when you've being distracted by grander plans on the horizon such as watching the Olympics- y'know like watching Michael Phelps winning his 8th gold medal before getting myself over!!! The hardest part to telling myself to just settle down and be patient for the finishing line is nearly there.

Recently, I just realised that my behaviour has been a tad hypocritical. I've been advising people to have passion in whatever we are doing when I, myself, am unable to fling open the doors to my own heart and embrace my love for my subjects for all that it is.

And it does not help a single bit as my assignment due dates are in two weeks time (and one more on the 5th of Sept. *phew*). However, as the day moves closer, the pressure is mounting, and I’m beginning to lose the coherent flow of my thoughts...

First class mentality

I have been absent from the blogosphere for about a week or so due to a heavy workload, maxed out lifestyle and sheer laziness.

All hail KJ, for finally posting.

Anyway, I spent the final hours of my Holydays doing a notice for a coming meeting, which by itself was quite a task for me since I had to design a notice that would stand out among the clutter of creatively-designed club notices. God knows, what sort of divine intervention has inspired Mr Adviser to ask me to design the notice and a form. Obviously, he had failed to consider the fact that the words creativity and KJ are antonyms. Well, I shall not pretend to understand the workings and complexities of a genius's brain. The outcome was nothing great, as expected and I could imagine the adviser's jaw slackened upon seeing my masterpiece. You can't expect much from a person who has completely zero talent in art, y'know.

One thing I have noticed this semester is the first class mentality of my course mates. They are not a boisterous bunch. They are not very sporting, either. However, they have very good sportsmanship. After 3 weeks of holy-days, I reunited with three of them in Marketing Strategy. As always, the top news of the hour was our Semester 1 results.

"You know what, I actually passed my M.R. and I got a distinction for C.B." enthused E, while L was overjoyed with her B for both C.B. and M.R. Another coursemate, C, a Business Admin major got the same results as L. My M.R. partner-in-crime managed 2As and 1B, the B was obviously for Leadership.

"You?" they asked me.

I paused briefly, stunned by their happiness, but bounced back, totally unfazed, and told them mine in my normal tone of voice.

Ah, the spirit of sportsmanship.....

My course mates are settling for two subjects again this semester, thus NOT putting ‘the merrier’ in ‘the more’, unlike ME, the brave one who took that bold step that NO student with raging hormones should ever take- taking 3 core subjects per semester with one subject as a self-study. Reason being that they do not want to stress themselves out. E would rather wait until Semester 2, 2009 (next year) to take Marketing Channels as she does not want to do distance learning since the college refused to open a class.

They aren’t worried about the assignments while I’m already nervous and apprehensive about getting through this semester (maybe because they only have to do 4 while I’ve to do 6). Does it mean that I have this sense of wisdom since my composure, at this stage, is excellent??? Oh yeah, I'm dead pleased with my myself, just the right blend of serious yet charming. LOL yes yes, daddy, self-praise is no praise.

In the midst of the rat race that grips us day by day, my course mates can still find some repose.
Don’t get me wrong, it’s a good thing. Their ability to have fun and be confident is something to be admired, not to be laughed at. If I had told my parents that I want to take a break from studying, hence delay my graduation, I’d have gotten a cold shoulder in return and I shudder to ponder on the consequences of their wrath. *sigh* Being so relax and care-free is something I have yet to truly grasp.

Looking forward to Olympics! 08.08.08. With three assignments due soon after...so I will have to endure a continuous link of mentally strenuous activities.

If you are still reading my spouting until now, you may think it's some crazy nonsensical spouting or that I'm just digressing since I like to talk round and round in circles and go off tangent -blame that on my inferior girly brain that is prone to 'loso-ism'. But it's not. Positive. You see, the stress escalates each day and I'm trying to suppress it but it manifests itself in my supreme crankiness and tempers towards people who really don't deserve it. So I'm struggling so hard to keep it at bay and try to think what God would do... but oh, my humanity... (and third class mentality).

HOLY-days

BEWARE: This is a "jealousy-inducing" post for those who are not on holidays. Please proceed at your own risk. Thank you.

Finally!!! After a long semester, I can feel an utter sense of liberty at last. No more encumbrance. No studies to worry for the time being. Indeed how nice it is to be liberated from all bondages!!!

I'm having my God-blessed semester break. It started 6 hours ago, exactly as 10:40am after the invigilator collected my CB exam answer script. With God's blessings, it was okay as I managed to "bull-shit" my way through with examples as I had forgotten some theories!! God is faithful, praise Him. The rest was history. After all, I'm on holy-days now. Don't worry, there's no spelling error or typo error here or in the title of this post. Uni has taught me well to appreciate holidays. That is why I call my much-needed semester breaks as God-blessed holy-days as they are as pure as holy water. Semester breaks=No more assignments, no more lecture/tutorials, no quizzes, no exams.... free from the period of reckoning. Ah, the day I have been waiting for since the beginning of the semester has finally arrived. Pure bliss, pure satisfaction.

Maybe that's one of the highlights of being a student. We have holy-days besides the normal weekends or public holidays. But weekends or public holidays aren't holy-days for us as most of the time, we still have assignments or quizzes to worry about so those holidays aren't holy-days at all. Well, life is all about of giving and taking...Thus, God is fair for rewarding students with holy-days after a long semester of hard work and _________. God is great.

F-R-E-E-D-O-M!!
(yay, I can spell the word FREEDOM!!!)

Anyway, it's time for me to go now. Got to get ready for tuition now (replacement for Monday since I couldn't make it and I don't want my employer to deduct my pay..., times are bad.....)

Till then, adios.

Important notice

If you scroll down the page, you will notice that I have written three posts for today.

1.) Inundated by memories
2.) OLD
3.) This post.

The reason why I'm blogging thrice today is because I won't be able to blog as much as I usually do for the coming three weeks or so because to one sadistic reason: EXAM -the dreaded period of reckoning.

It’s going to be one heck of a month this June and I really do hope that I would not literally kill myself while whipping my brain cells dead with the constant mind-numbing effects of studying.

One thing that I'm constantly injecting into my brain to prevent myself from having a nervous breakdown is the fact that the much-needed, God-blessed semester break begins exactly at 10:40am 25 June 2008 (provided I did not screw any of my papers up!!). Something to look forward to nonetheless. YIPPPIEEEE….

Expect very little posting in the three coming weeks of temporary hiatus. However, if I do post a lot as usual, that means I've given up hope on ever succeeding……

So Good Luck, KJ and to everyone else whose life have been dominated by ASSIGNMENTS, QUIZZES and EXAMS. ….

But for now, I shall take my leave, for my body is weak and my mind, unrested.

Still, it's time to get back to serious revision.

PS: I turn into a nocturnal animal during pre-exams periods but I go into hibernation during post-exam periods.

OLD

When I was a kid, I wanted to grow up fast. I looked forward to my birthdays as it meant one year older (Note: the saying one year wiser does not apply to me). When I was a teenager and old enough to be cynical about the political environment in MALAYsia, I was dying to reach the age of 21 so that I will eligible to register as a voter. The day I turned 23, I waited impatiently for 8th March to cast my vote for the very first time. After that, I waited impatiently for the results to be announced... During those times, I wanted time to pass faster.

Lately, Dilys and I had been having a debate about turning 23. I've turned 23 3 months ago but I don't feel 23 yet because I'm in a denial mode.

Time passes by real fast NOW.
It's already the middle of 2008.
Exam's in less than 2 weeks time (and here I am in no motivation to study at all).

My days are numbered as I will soon transform into an an old lady wallowing in loneliness...

Recently, my personality has taken a change for the worst. I've become more pessimistic, doubtful of myself, cranky, irritable, impatient, angry, and prone to making scathing remarks. I have became more emo as seen by this piece of writing!!!!

In time to come, I will miss writing 2 as the first digit of my age.
I will miss being young, for soon I will be old.
It will be an occasion worthy of mourning.

Ligo California Golden Seedless Raisins

I grew up eating LOADS of this…

Ligo California Golden Seedless Raisins

It was one of those few permitted treats that was available at home,

Thanks to dad who made it a point to buy the pack of 6 each time we went grocery shopping since I would not settle for any generic brands including the one in the red box- what’s that brand again??? SunMaid???

But I somehow stopped eating it when I was about 12.
I don’t remember why,
maybe I got sick of it…..

Then 2 weeks ago, I went grocery shopping at Boulevard Hypermarket with my parents,

It somehow caught my attention; it brought back memories of my childhood days…..…..

And found myself eating it again while doing my revision for my CB Quiz 5,

after a decade or so…..

I do not know what made me buy it…what made me willing to pay RM1 for it??

4Ps??? (product, price, place, promotion)
Shelf-space positioning?
Situational influences: Antecedent state (features of an individual that are not lasting, eg: momentary moods)??
Experiential shopper?
Impulse buying?
The schematic memory (what the consumer thinks of or feel when the brand is mentioned) of it???
Episodic memory (memory of a series of events in which a person participated eg: personal memories that often elicit imagery and feelings)???

I don’t know…..

But all I know, it was my childhood bliss…..

Pure Joy...
SATISFACTION...
Childhood paradise...
miss those days
Apparently, I only liked the Yellow ones
Note: My box of raisins got demoted to the floor to give way to my laptop. That is why the background is white/ grey. I'm sitting on the floor in the sitting room with my books on the floor, notes on the table, file on the chair....

Okay, time to get myself together and start studying my ass off...

Part of my Consumer Behaviour Module 9 notes
created by KJ (copyright 2008)
- in time for my quiz tonight..

Leadership Quiz 3 next week
Exam's in 2 weeks time...
MR is killing me...
Got to stock up on my Ligo California Golden Seedless Raisins this weekend before I start on my MR revision spree...

Till then....
best wishes

here, have a Ligo California Golden Seedless Raisin...

-
-
-
-

Oooops, can't let you try one.

It's finished.
I just finished it up....

Sorry, but i will remember to let you try a raisin when i stock my supply of Ligo California Golden Seedless Raisins up so you wouldn't call me a stingy or kiam siap person... :)

MR assignment 2 BLUEs

To anyone who traverse the territories of my land here on blogspot.com., thank you for trespassing dropping by....

In case I do not survive the stampede of MR assignment 2 that will be due on 26th May 2008 (5pm AEST), this will be my last post ever. thousand apologies for all that I have done wrong... thank you. (condolence messages and wreaths are most welcome -Touch Wood-) Oh yeah, I'm sure I can do with some monetary donations too as the inflation rate in Malaysia has risen to 3.0% for the month of April and world oil price has reached $133.17 per barrel this morning!!! So thanks in advance!!!

My loathe love for SPSS and *heart*red the Uni for giving me such an interesting and mind-rotting question for MR assignment 2 is beyond description. I *heart* MR assignment.

But like what our BN government said during our 12th GE, "we are moving on the right track. Vote Barisan Nasional." Therefore, I shall say, "My MR assignment 2 is moving on the right track. Vote STUDIES for peace, security and stability." (Sorry, can't vote BN at the moment. Tun Dr M and co's exodus from UMNO is leaving me in doubts. Anyway, there's no elections.) Hmm, vote Father of Consumerism (consumerism=movement to protect consumers) @Ralph Nader and Matt Gonzalez as President and VP of USA. But I can't. I'm not a superdelegate in USA. Oh fine, I shall go back to Malaysia, back to my home sweet home, and Vote for MR Assignment 2. Aye?!!!

**KJ tunes her mind to MR mode**.

Back to serious work.
-in vain attempt. MR and CB just ate her remaining brain cells up.-

Teachers....

11th May, 2008 (2nd Sunday in May): Mother's Day- "Happy Mother's Day, mummy."
15th June, 2008 (3rd Sunday in June): Father's Day- "Happy Father's Day, papa"
16th May, 2008: Teacher's Day -Truthfully speaking, I never bothered to remember this date. After all, somebody is bound to remind me when the time comes. In kindergarten and primary school, we had to make teacher's day card during art class a few days before (yes, I made a total of 9 teacher's day cards but all of it ended up in the dustbin without fail every year because nobody, including myself, appreciated my talent in modern art. Well, all my art teachers gave me nothing above a C for my cards. Wait a minute, maybe the C meant creative!!). In secondary school, the head prefect would remind us about it and this meant event planning and event management. When I entered college, a message board would be put up at the lobby for students to pen messages to the lecturers. Then this year, the good ol' president of the Student Council emailed all the club presidents to instruct us to buy a gift for our respective club advisors. And when I read the email, the first word that came out from my mouth was "SH_T, I'm going to be a more bankrupt person this month." I just treated my Miracle of Being, Obliging to the extreme, Tenderness of loving, Heart of gold, Educator of my discipline and manners, Recklessness of giving, mummy to a meal on Sunday and I need to save up to treat my Faithful, Altruistic, Trusting, Humble, Ever-so-loving, Righteous, Supportive and beloved daddy something on daddy's day.

And now, I have to spend money to buy something for the club advisor for Teacher's Day. Teachers? What are they? Who are they? What did they do? Oh yeah, because of teachers, I developed a love-hate relationship with studies!!! Hey, at least there are still some elements of love in it. (The element of love to pass that subject and be one step nearer to achieving my goal!!).

But I have to accept the fact that it’s the time of the year again when we celebrate one of the greatest entities of our nation: teachers/ lecturers/ educators. The teaching profession: the noble profession; and to quote my Physics tuition teacher when I was in Form 4 and Form 5, Mr Khoo, "the profession that creates other profession." Throughout my years of education that I had in different schools, I was under the wings of many teachers; some who were very dedicated, while others sadly, were non-committal. Why were they uncommitted? Perhaps they are part of the out-group according to the leader-member exchange theory?? Perhaps they had too many students like me who had rudimentary knowledge in that particular subject?? Perhaps their upper echelons did not practice the four subfields of humanistics perspectives: human relations movement, human resources perspective, behavioural science approach or management science?? Or like what Millika Vasugi stated in page E7 of the Sunday Star (11th May 2008), perhaps it is not always possible to be passionate about every aspect of their teaching duties? Perhaps they were not given the subject of their choice? Perhaps, they were tired (and I so happen to be the victim of their aftermath). Nevertheless, I have to admit that I reciprocated their resentment accordingly....

Anyway, the "hell" of this semester (which has not ended yet) has made me more creative so I shall not let my creativity go to waste. Thus, I shall compose a poem dedicated to all the teachers and lecturers who have taught me patiently (even when your words always bounced off my auditory canal for some unknown reason, thus failed to enter my memory), sacrificed their time for my well-being, and believed that I would make the grade.

Lecturers and teachers are creatures of mythical wonder,
With powers of knowledge so great, they can break hearts asunder,
They make us learn and understand theories like crazy,
so that we will be prepared mentally,
for this wonderful contraception,
Exams, tests, quizzes or assignments, it may be called, to punish deception.

"Good morning, (or whatever time of the day it is)" is their usual phrase,
whether a gentleman or lady with a smiling face,
But behind those mask, i somehow know,
that the passion to teach and share lurks, and will always grow.

These creatures are always so patient, even in stress,
they never give less than their very best,
They are wise and share from their heart,
not just lessons from books, but worldly advice they impart.

But there is something we, students, should be aware,
especially when we get a little (??) noisy and inattentive,
I know it's students' nature, the behaviour called mischief,
but some of these wonderful creatures just don't care,
they may scream and prance like a furious roan,
as if we are deaf and have no minds of our own,
So when this happens, please beware!
They can strip you your dignity, even your hair.
But after doing it, they do feel miserable and terrible too,
So to all students, don't act like a fool...

They know everything, these wonderful creatures,
from economics, management and marketing theories,
But one thing we do know is that these creatures are known,
For their service to the society and dedication they have shown.

THANK YOU, TEACHERS... THANK YOU, LECTURERS...

OMG, in retrospect, it all sounds very lame. Since assignments have fragmented my thinking patterns, this post will be greatly-fragmented as well. I shall dedicate a better post to all my wonderful creatures teachers/ lecturers/ educators/ tutors on Thursday in appreciation of their patience and dedication. Note: I am posting it on Thursday instead of the actual day because being a humble person that I am, I do not want to steal the limelight away from the others on Friday!!!!

Market Research assignment 2 calls...

Reality hits in...

Just when I thought things were going smoothly as planned, reality check puts me back in the front seat of life.

Reality hits in. To think of it, I have got one essay due next week, one assignment due on the 26th, CB Online Quiz 4 opening next week so I must get it completed by the 23rd, CB Online Quiz 5 opening on the 30th and Leadership quiz 3 due end of this month.... **GAH**..Academic stuff aside, I received an email from the president of SCS Student Council saying that I've got to prepare the Student Council I&E statement and promote the YEC during the orientation for the new bunch of babies intake on the afternoon of 24th May...**pukes**...Unfortunately, my preparation for my quizzes and MR assignment have been put to halt due to my Leadership essay..... (and reality hits in that my essay is 40% completed as of today but it has surpassed the word limit by a grand four-figure amount and reality hits in that the list of references is not enough!!!). Preparation for those non-academic matters????????????????????????

Last night (and just now, as well), as I was trying to continue on my Leadership essay, an unpleasant message appeared in my mind: "There are no more ideas inside the brains. Please insert some more ideas into KJ's brains." So I tried to insert some ideas into my brains, but another message appeared: "KJ's brains have encountered a problem and needs to be closed."

So I decided to go online to read some blogs. My first stop was YB Wong Ho Leng's blog that presents a daily summary of Sarawak's DUN meeting. On most days of the sitting, the meeting convened around 5-10 minutes later because there are insufficient number of assemblymen in the Hall for a quorum. This left me wondering, how do you expect us to keep time when our leaders do not keep time even?? But anyway, reality hits in that I'm leaving in a society where the practice of the polychronic-time culture is a norm. Wait a minute, this website says that polychronic people are easily distracted and subjected to interruptions... ***Reality hits into KJ's head that that is why she chucked her essay aside again. She is just NOT DISCIPLINE at all***

After that, I went to YB Lim Kit Siang's blog for some political updates and spent around 20 minutes enjoying 2 YouTube footage on our YB Lim's debate on why the DAP MP for Kota Melaka, Sim Tong Him, and two DAP assemblymen, Goh Leong Sin (Kesidang) and Lim Jak Wong (Bachang), in Malacca last week were arrested by the police. I also watched the footage about the world's richest unemployed that was uploaded today..Then I stumbled upon Din Merican's blog that contained 3 YouTubes videos of our fiery and articulate Ipoh Timur MP raising the issue about RPK's arrest when it was his turn to hold the floor in the debate on the royal address. He took two hours to deliver his speech, which was of course filled with endless interjections, clarifications, demands for rebuttals mostly from BN backbenchers. (Thank you YB Lim for raising all those issues up in the dewan Rakyat. You are really the people's eyes, ears and mouth in the Dewan Rakyat.) Reality hits in that I must agree with Azmi Anshar's write-up about our DAP stalwart.

How I wish that I am the world's richest unemployed. How I wish I am one of the advisers to the Prime Minister of Malaysia...Read this to find out how much Datuk Seri Shahrizat Abdul Jalil, the adviser on women and social development affairs, and Tan Sri Dr Abdul Hamid Othman, the adviser on religious matters earn per month. It makes Tun Dr. Mahathir's salary as the adviser to Petronas look little... A big thank you to the PKR's Member of Parliament for Kulim Bandar Baru, YB Zulkifli Noordin, for posting the questions, and to our Prime Minister for his written reply...By the way Datuk Seri Prime Minister, is there any vacancy for me as an adviser to you???

The DAP MP for Taiping cum assemblymen for Pantai Remis, YB Nga Kor Ming, is a great orator too. It reminds me of a Malaysian version of Barrack Obama. All praise to the other MPs too, be it from the Barisan Nasional or the Opposition side. Most of them speak very well with beautiful Bahasa Malaysia....***reality hits into KJ's head that she has to improve her command of the BM language*** Unfortunately, the act of the Independent MP for Pasir Mas, Datuk Ibrahim Ali, apologising to the physically challenged BUT NOT to YB Karpal Singh has irked me. ***Reality hits into KJ's head that not ALL Member of Parliaments in Malaysia are professional to differentiate between work and play...***

After that, I visited several other social-political blogs for more updates about Raja Petra Kamarudin, only to feel happy that he has finally agreed to post bail and has been released. Life must have been tough for his family members too. This posting on Susan Loone's blog touched my heart. Though I'm across the South China Sea, I stand with solidarity with everyone who participated in the RPK's candle vigil at the Sungai Buloh prison and Dataran Merdeka for the past two nights.

Then I stumbled upon the DAP MP for Rasah, YB Loke Siew Fook's blog and I was shocked when I read this. (Thank you, YB Loke for posting this)

Total undergraduates in local universities (2007) : 382,997

Bumiputra - 79.7%
Chinese - 12%
Indian - 3.2%
International - 3.7%

Is this a real reflection the meritocracy system??? Why is the Indian admission to local universities 3.2% while the admission of International students 3.7%??? *KJ gasps in horror* Aren't Indians Malaysians too??? ***Reality hits into KJ's head that this is MALAYsia***. Anyway, I strongly agree with the Barisan Nasional MP for Alor Gajah, Datuk Seri Dr Fong Chan Onn's proposal that the government should adopt a single entry system into local universities. (Excellent proposal, Datuk Seri Dr Fong. Keep it up.)

Okay, I feel that there are some space in my brains now so I shall take advantage of this rare opportunity to continue on with my never-seem-to-finish essay. Hope it's not another false alarm.

Have a great weekend, people...

Leadership essay beckons... this calls for concentration.

Reality hits into KJ's empty head that she has to concentrate.
and reality hits into KJ's head that it is already Saturday morning....

Stubbornness to the extreme

When I was small, I remembered my mum wringing her hands in exasperation at me, saying "why are you so stubborn. Do you know that you are even more stubborn than a donkey??". Despite the numerous punishments that I received from my parents as a result of my wrongdoings caused by my stubbornness, I am still as stubborn as ever. I guess operant learning did not work on me!!

Before Online Quiz 3 opened, my lecturer was drowning into our saturated minds that we should be extremely well-prepared before attempting the quiz. Do not rush to attempt it and if possible, work with your course mates….

Being a stubborn person (as usual), I defied his advice (well, sort-off). I attempted the quiz one day after it opened (one week before the due date) since I felt that I was well-prepared for it. I decided to do it while the things I had revised for the past 2 days were still fresh in my head. I regretted my actions while on my first attempt. The questions were so hard and the answers were so close to each other. Halfway through my first attempt, the connection lagged for some reason. The page took two minutes or so to open and the timer was still running while waiting for it to open. I panicked. I felt the chills and tingling sensation flowing through my veins. Nevertheless, I remained vigilant and prayed fervently to be able to complete it.

I do not work together with my course mates when attempting my quizzes. My reason is simple. My course mates usually attempt the quiz one day before it closes or on the day itself. This is thing I dare not do since I have this phobia that the website would be jammed since everyone’s also rushing to complete the quiz. Who knows, Streamyx may decide to take a break, thus slow down the connection…..or maybe in one part of the Earth, an earthquake might just strike and cause the internet connection to be affected, similar to what happened on 28^th December, 2006 when an undersea earthquake off the coast of Taiwan measuring 7.2 on the Ritcher Scale struck and hit a lot of underground cables, thus disrupted most internet communications. Touch Wood.

I’m glad that my first wave of assignment and quizzes are over. I did not do badly for any. Probably my worst one is Leadership but it’s still a pass!!! I have (finally) completed my CB assignment 2. Woke up at 7:40am this morning to go to dad’s office to print it out. So I’m just praying fervently that I have complied with the requirements. I need to start my Leadership essay soon. It's due in 2 weeks time. Maybe I shall start my research tonight. I hope to finish it by next week so I can concentrate fully on MR assignment 2. Anyway, with a bit discipline, I’m sure I can get the essay done. NOTE TO SELF: Cut down your online hours.

Back to my Online Quiz 3, I’m glad I did not screw it up. I managed to get a full score for my second attempt…**WOOT** Surprisingly, I did quite well for the quiz I thought I had screwed up (Thank God we are given two attempts and Thank God I did well in both attempts!!)..….Hmm, maybe I should consider taking up UIU’s Bachelor in Psychology after completing my degree programme… Imagine getting a postgraduate degree in Psychology from Upper Iowa University. Imagine going to UIU’s Fayette campus. AaaaaaH, breathless thrill of freedom.... Free to speak, free to express my opinions, free to..... *KJ slaps herself *

By the way, can anyone tell me what is so great about the donuts at Big Apple Donuts and Coffee??? I do not find anything spectacular about their donuts. Last Saturday (26/4/2008), I stepped foot into Big Apple Donuts and Coffee at tHe Spring for the first time ever since it opened, only to leave as a dissatisfied customer. Actually it wasn’t my idea to go there since feedbacks from friends have told me that J. Co donuts win pants down. Mum was attracted by the bunting outside the shop which said something like “free donut for every cup of coffee or tea” so I found myself lining up for 20 minutes just to purchase 1 cup of coffee and 3 cups of tea, while dad was sitting resolute on the chair watching everyone queuing up and mum and sis went shopping at God-knows-where. (Being the youngest in the family, it seems like it is an ascribed role that I will be the one queuing up to place the order on behalf of my family at any self-service eateries.) Okay, back to my story. I had to endure the over 20 minutes queue since the cashier refused to entertain my order earlier on even though she was quite free since her next customer was still deciding which flavours to get. Well, Fair enough since everyone’s queuing up too. When it was finally my turn, the cashier charged me RM46 for 4 cups of drinks. Actually, I didn’t realize that there was a mistake in the calculations since I was fuming after queuing up for what-seems-like-hours, hence was not thinking rationally. I finally realized that there was something wrong after Dad knocked some sense into my head. I went up to the cashier and demanded to see the receipt as she said earlier on it was their policy that they keep the receipt. When I saw the receipt, I was shocked to see that I was billed an additional RM22 for a dozen donuts, which I did not even order in the first place.

Me: Miss, I think there is a mistake. I did not purchase a dozen donuts.
Cashier: Yes, you did. I saw you lining up.
Me: What has lining up got to do with this??
Cashier: Usually, people line up to buy our donuts.
Me: HELLO, I lined up because earlier on, you asked me to line up despite the fact that I told you that I just want a cup of coffee and 3 cups of tea.
Cashier: But I remembered handing your donuts to you.
Me: Since when?? And for your information, there are no donuts with me except for the 4 FOC original donuts that came with the drinks. If you don’t believe, go check my seat if you want..(Pointing to my place). See, you see any of your Big Apple plastic bag or box over there?????
Cashier: Are you sure you didn’t buy 12 donuts???
Me: I swear that I did not buy your donuts… and did you see me passing any Big Apple plastic bag to anyone or leaving your outlet???
Cashier: Like that ah, or you line up and choose 12 donuts lor…
Me: I do not want your donuts, okay… Just return RM22 back to me….
Cashier: You take 12 donuts is the same as me returning you back RM22.
Me: How many times must I tell you, I do not want your donuts. I want my money back….

In the end, the cashier unwillingly returned RM22 back to me without apologizing to me….This unfortunate incident was enough to make me dissatisfied, thus experiencing postpurchase dissonance. Being a stubborn person, I don’t think I will line up to buy their donuts anytime around- many thanks to the idiotic cashier at Big Apple Donuts and Coffee at tHe Spring who attempted to rip siphon RM22 out of my Dad's pockets. Anyway, I'm not really into sweet stuff (though I will never resist J. Co donuts!!!!).

Is it just me or what that I find Big Apple donuts too sweet???? I personally think that Big Apple donuts are nothing to shout about…

-Sorry for digressing -

Fiction: RMx36_7o

Foreword: truth will prevail and justice will be done. This is a fiction story that is written based on a real-life situation but with some creative(?) elements added in it in an attempt to bring vagueness to an entirely new level.

Special Agent A is my reporting superior. He had brought me to see beyond the realm of science, to believe what I once thought was totally impossible. Over the months of being under him, I had grown to respect him, his judgments on certain things, and his absurd theories.

RMx36_7o is a young, mysterious and intense partner of mine who went missing two months ago. Special Agent A then assigned me a me to a new partner called Cr3a71v3 8C²oUn71n9 to replace RMx36_7o. I strongly objected the idea for I knew of no one who deserved to undertake such an important role. I voiced to Special Agent A the possibilities that RMx36_7o might still be out there stalking the dead. Being an open-minded person, Special Agent A found my statement plausible indeed because after all, RMx36_7o’s body has not been found. There was complete emptiness, not even the remains of the rumoured alien skeletons….

I was determined to find RMx36_7o. Special Agent A and I listed down many plausible theories for RMx36_7o’s mysterious disappearance: alien abduction, mysterious rescuer, spontaneous human combustion, RMx36_7o ala David Copperfield the 2nd…or could RMx36_7o be an abnormal mortal who went through the two phases of death ie somatic death (the cessation of the vital process) and molecular death (the progressive disintegration of the body) simultaneously as soon as its heart ceased to function, coupled with rapid decomposition of its bones???

After many sleepless nights, hoping that RMx36_7o would just call from some place far away and assure me of its safety, I drifted in deep sleep one night and dreamt of RMx36-7o. I was in the dense forest. From where I stood, I witnessed an extremely bright shimmering light about a few yards away. A shadow of a human emerged from among the darkness. I recognized the human immediately even though it was impossible to make out the face. It was RMx36_7o and it was calling out to me.

"xxxx, Special Agent A was right! They do exist! They are real!"

"RMx36_7o, what are you talking about?? Who are they you are referring to???"

Before RMx36_7o could reply, it vanished. I ran towards the source of light, but the light dimmed and was eventually swallowed by the menacing darkness again. I called out frantically for RMx36_7o but to no avail….

I woke up. I was sweating hard. It was all just a dream…...

I related my dream to Special Agent A the next morning, and it occurred to him that the dream might mean something; could RMx36_7o be abducted by aliens??? I found it illogical considering the fact that I never believed in extraterrestrials. However, at that moment, nothing was illogical anymore….

The next day, I conveniently forgot to switch on my phone as I was busy working on another case. During my break, I switched my phone on and the first sms received was from Special Agent A. RMx36_7o has been found. It was found lying motionless in the autopsy room that morning. No serious injuries but it was suffering from memory loss.

Being a fast learner, RMx36_7o was accepted back into the job immediately but the part of its mysterious disappearance and how it suddenly reappeared in the autopsy room was just gone, like it never happened…

Till today, the case of RMx36_7o's disappearance and discovery was never solved or explained. Agent RMx36_7o could not determine this incident due to its loss of memory from a brain injury…No one came forward to bear witness to how RMX36_7o suddenly appeared where it had been found. The authorities issued a letter to the Bureau to stop further investigation into this case. Thus, the case, coded X-RMx36_7o/2008, is officially declared closed.

But to me, Special Agent A solved yet another X-file...

-END OF STORY-

-Yesterday's problem was resolved completely by "Special Agent A" this morning-
*Bravo*

End note (19/4/2008)- My SPSS descriptive statistics output abnormality was solved by Special Agent S² (outside contact hours). Well, she didn't have to reply my ranting email but she did, despite her packed schedule.....

-and it is in times like these when I wonder, though I SOMETIMES think that my lecturers at SCS come from another galaxy, but if it weren't for them, WHERE WOULD I BE??

Deliriously happy....

You know how sometimes we struggle with issues that we once thought we have conquered??? Last Monday and today was one of those days. I wanted to scream my lungs out, or something of that sort... While in the midst of re-doing my CB assignment, I had to prepare all those secretarial and treasurer reports since everyone was un-contactable. Since it was due on 18/4/2008, I chucked my CB assignment aside and I finished the reports and I&E statement on Saturday. Good, all I needed was the approval of the adviser, then it's ready for submission to the upper echelons of the college's administration of student's clubs. So I thought I could get it done by yesterday... Bravo...

Then something went wrong along the way and I was stuck thinking about a mentally exhausting matter that has the potential of sapping every ounce of energy produced by cellular respiration in the mitochondria that is left within my body.... and the club's treasurer@ miss-know-it-all offered me some brilliant suggestions on how to resolve the problem but when asked to actually solve it, her answer was, "aiyoh, I cannot. The records are with you. If you want me to do, you need to send everything over to my house... but I can't get it done by 18th leh..., very busy working...."

-another NATO (no action, talk only) parable-
*KJ goes up in shrieks of laughter*

Just before lunch, I was trying to be smart again, wanting to portray myself as an ethical person. Unfortunately, being an illiterate person, I brilliantly told him that it was unethical to do something.... (note: that thing is actually ethical and legal). This spells for disaster... What I have learned in Business Ethics, Financial Accounting 2 and Financial Management have gone down the rafters (probably as a result of the constant dozing during lessons echelons....).....

I have to admit that I’m the kind who gives my all to the moment and then move on.....since I made up my mind that the completion of my CB assignment lies as my top priority, thus the unresolved club problem will remain unresolved until I have completed my CB assignment 101%.
Problem unresolved=late submission. Never mind, since I had asked for a dateline extension... but if I get into trouble, the rest of them will see themselves landing in deep shit together with me no matter how "busy" they are!!!!!

And as I was ranting about how unlucky I was, his reply reached my inbox, presented in such an understanding demeanour and immediately, the problem was resolved temporarily.... (Thank God). Like a true marketer and lecturer, he preached what he said: "consumer's perception is important to marketers because it is their reality."......

At that instant, I became deliriously happy (and still is because tonight's MR class has been canceled.).

Anyway, during CB lecture last night, I came up with several brilliant irrelevant answers to keep with my stupidity, leaving him worried that he has a mentally deranged student in the class shocked because my stupidity was (and is still) beyond disbelief.

Lecturer: anymore examples of emotions?
KJ: Suicidal.

Lecturer: What is cross-culture??
KJ: Pua chai.... you know those kids with mix blood -the half English, half Chinese people....

(and there was this blur look on his face - can't blame him cos my answer was obviously wrong and incorrigible. But I didn't do it on purpose. I really didn't know what cross culture was but I wanted to be pretend to be clever!!!)

Anyway, I'll need to wake up soon. And then reality will hit….My CB assignment is still uncompleted; leadership quiz 2 and CB quiz 3 are round the corner and they are clamouring for my attention. Leadership essay and MR assignment 2 will follow suit in no time…… and I don't understand the instructions given for SPSS- cleaning data. My descriptive statistics output looks so weird... I guess it's wrong then :( ......

*sigh*
why must good things end so soon????

Side note: According to YB Jeff Ooi, MP for Jelutong, people's supremacy (ketuanan rakyat) will bring about changes to the economy, education and political systems.... Towards a better Malaysia.....

Foul mood....

I wanted to become a good student. I decided not to procrastinate in doing my work so I spent my weekend doing my CB assignment. It was tough. I swat all the negative thoughts away in an attempt to complete the parts that I aimed to complete. Though the assignment sapped every ounce of energy that I had within me, but I managed to achieve my goals for that week. I felt happy that my sacrifices had paid off....

I was indeed very pleased with my masterpiece (and my achievement)...

Unfortunately, someone was not.
The comment came....
"re-think after briefing tomorrow". (yes, only these words)
__________________

I literally felt my heart breaking........ I wanted to bawl my eyes out....

My sacrifices obviously didn't pay off...

***KJ exudes profanities***

@#$%&!@* -censored-

My masterpiece was obviously like SHIT....

-Screw assignments..screw EVERYTHING-

I think the main problem with me and my assignments is that there is this period of unbearable rote before you become any good at it, and I just can't bring myself to get past that stage.

At the rate I'm going, I think I will NEVER get past that unbearable rote so I'd most probably sleep in class tomorrow evening, then he would get all emo and throw me out.....

Great.....
Good riddance......
-Perfect-

Note: "He" here is subjective. The sex of that particular person shall not be reviewed.

CB Quiz 2

5 minutes ago, I was accessing the Study Desk to retrieve my CB Quiz 2 results....

Cold sweat broke upon my forehead... I was worried that I had screwed my Quiz 2 up. I did study for it but I guess I did not read the textbook THOROUGHLY because I found out that I made some mistakes when I was surfing the net, hoping to get some info for my CB assignment 2.... I didn’t know evaluative criteria establish a consumer’s evoked set. Quester et al. (2004) defines evaluative criteria as the features or desired characteristics of a product required to meet the consumer’s needs. I didn’t know it establishes the brands that the consumer is willing to consider for solution. (*KJ hopes that her lecturer aka Mr Einstein of Brand Lab would never ever read this post...her profound stupidity is a disgrace to the human race...so siasoi... KJ runs away to hide...*) Anyway, it was too late to over spilled milk.....

Nevertheless, elated-with-a-tinge-of-disappointment was the appropriate adjective to describe my feelings when I saw my score. I was not hallucinating. My score was just as I expected (Thank God), but I was slightly disappointed as it was a slight deterioration from Quiz 1 (can't help that luck was by side when I did quiz 1!!!).

Anyway, I'm thankful that my scores so far are fine... Just hoping that I can maintain it for the rest my quizzes. But I'm not quite sure about that because the rest of the quizzes would be much harder. I know that I need to study real hard for my CB quiz 3, 4 and 5. I MUST NOT SCREW THE REST OF MY QUIZZES UP. I NEED THOSE MARKS BADLY....Meanwhile, I'm just hoping for the best... Hope is a good thing, right???

I must stop wasting my time. I so need to learn to manage time more wisely. Discipline and motivation is what I so desperately need now. Oh, God, Where are You??? I MUST COMPLETE THE MAJOR PARTS OF MY CB ASSIGNMENT 2 BY MONDAY 7/4/2008...But my mind is constipated and I have no ideas on how to proceed.

A student's life- love it or hate it????

Whoever said a uni student’s life is fun- STFU

This is life as a university student:

1.) You sometimes doubt if the course you are taking now really suits you.

2.) Graduation, to you = freedom. Free from assignments, tutorials, tests/ quizzes, boring lectures, exercises, exams and most importantly, those “inhumane” examiners who never seem to understand student’s feelings but instead, torture us by setting “absurd” exam questions and difficult assignment questions until the time and effort you spent doing it does not justify the marks weighted for it (unfortunately, though you did your best, the examiner didn’t think so). But fret not; NOT ALL lectures are boring and NOT ALL examiners are “inhumane”. There are still some understanding and caring lecturers around who would reply any emails within 24 hours)

3.) You dread entering the corporate world but at the same time, you are dieing to leave the “torture chamber”. The word “quitting now” does not exist in your vocabulary since you have come so far already and you really need that piece of paper (@certificate). So the only consolation about working is at least you get paid for being “tortured”, unlike students who pay to be tortured.

4.) Several weeks before exams, you cannot get what you are studying into your head because your brains are “saturated”. You only gain your momentum when exam is one/two weeks away, and that is when you begin to study frantically. Stress builds up and multiple ulcers start developing in your mouth (it sucks when you have a few big white ulcers on your tonsils).

5.) When exams and assignment deadlines are just around the corner, you no longer communicate. Instead, you whine, rant, vent, complain, and exude profanities...

6.) You no longer lead the “makan bola, tidur bola and minum Coca Cola” lifestyle. Instead, your lifestyle now is “makan buku, tidur buku and minum Coca Cola”. Note: the reason why you are drinking Coca Cola now is because of the caffeine factor. One of these is a necessity: Coffee, energy bars, Red Bull, Brands essence of chicken, herbal tea, and ginseng tea. (Mine's herbal tea to "reduce heatiness")

7.) The alarm clock tells you when it’s time to go to sleep. During certain times of the semester (every uni student will know when is it), you get too engross in your revision and assignments that you actually forget to sleep. Therefore, you need you alarm clock to tell you when to sleep so that you wouldn’t “float” to lectures with blood-shot eyes, feeling like a zombie.

8.) Public Holidays and weekends, to you, is utmost important. It is not just another day. It is the day where we can catch up with our sleep and complete our unfinished tasks (though it is impossible to complete it in a day but at least, we are assured that there would not be any exercises and etc to add on to our accumulated pile of work).9.) Semester break=heaven.

10.) You appreciate boredom/having nothing to do. The phrase, “I’m going to die of boredom” is rarely heard. More often than not, you will hear this phrase, “Those who want to commit suicide should join us…our workload is enough to kill us. It would be a miracle if I’m still alive by the end of this sem”

11.) Your textbooks and notes are more than your references or “bible”. They are your hand rest (while your hand is your pillow), weights for you to build your muscles, and your oxygen in class and while you are doing your revision (you can’t survive without it).

12.) You love your textbooks so much that you know how they smell like. You can recognize your textbook by just smelling it. You are so proud of it that you are no longer ashamed of drooling on your textbook anymore. By the end of the semester, your textbook smells just like its owner.

There you have it, people... A uni student's life: Love it or hate it- we still have to hang on for the sake of qualifications..... So to all my friends, may we will all fight for what we are fighting for. All the best and God bless.....