CNY is never complete without gambling,
True.
**
Today is the fifth day of the Year of the Ox. I have yet to play Black Jack this year, neither did I play last year. I was away the year before.
"C'mon, it's a once-a-year affair. We play small anyway. You see, all your cousins are playing too..."
I pondered. CNY is never complete without gambling.
I shrugged. "No, thank you," I replied, "I do not fancy gambling."
**
I used to enjoy gambling when I was kid. I had the perception that those who gambled during CNY were matured and cool people. So I would join my relatives at the dining table, using my angpow money as my capital.
It was fun and loud during my first attempt. I won.
Things changed the next year. It was excruciating to watch my money fly one Ringgit by one Ringgit. I lost RM3. My cousins won. Being a kiasu person, I cried. I complained. I was 10 years old then. It was there and then when I was given the understanding that in every game, there will always be a winner and a looser. This round I was the looser.
I never gambled from then on. Probably I did but I don't remember. But even if I did, the moment I start loosing, I run to avoid further loss.
**
My fundamental personality has not changed. I'm an introvert, and I think I always have been. I'm not spontaneous and I've a hard time taking the initiative to do something. I'm slightly better at that now than I was before, but in essence I haven't changed. I no longer exhibit my horridly spiteful temper, but that part of me is still in there somewhere. I'm still cautious; but a little more calculative and less of a risk-taker.
A cousin dinner awaits. There will Not be any gambling later. I am sure of it. Even if there is, I wouldn't gamble.
After all, I do not like taking risks, especially those that involve finance.
And I begin to wonder, why did I take Business Studies in the first place?
*sigh*
I'm off.
No comments:
Post a Comment